Kinless, not Kithless, you are not alone
December is a month in the USA that exemplifies the term both. It’s both joyful and sorrowful, invitingly warm and frigidly separate, plentiful and scarce. Throughout the contiguous 12 months of the calendar most often used in this part of the northern, western hemisphere there are a couple of “holiday months” AND none seems more celebrated, broadcast, and re-broadcast than December.
This is the month with which I struggle most between loving it and hating it. (And both remain steadfastly true throughout all 31 days). Finding the balance on the edge of the coin joining revelry and heartache is foremost in my mind this month. I suspect I am not alone with these feelings.
Yes, revelry and heartache can and do exist simultaenously in our experiences. Humanness (and life) is the coin of both and, not either or. The “coin” only exists with both sides being true at all times. Holding and making space for that seemingly contradictory tension is the realm of reality.
If you never had, or no longer have, parents, siblings, children (or grandchildren), spouse/significant other, cousins, or other “kin” (see the Webster definition thereof, offered at the end of this post), it does not mean you are “kithless” (again, see Webster definition below). Furthermore, broaden your definition of kin (all due respect, Merriam Webster), and you will be enthralled by the “family” that surrounds you. Embrace all this kin and the world will open to and embrace you. (Buy and read Humans & Nature anthology Kinship: Belonging in a World of Relations, https://humansandnature.org/).
Nonetheless, humans seek and need other humans with whom to share verbal communication. We are woefully inept (most, not all) in communication that does not involve words. Personally, I yearn for thoughtful, meaningful, challenging conversations with others of my species, especially at this time of year. And, I relax and recharge in the company of my non-human kin that have no need for words.
Reach out to the kin/kith around you and welcome it in. Find humans with whom to share kind words, and other kin with whom to commune non-verbally.
I share this with the universe in hopes that it provides some context for other humans and maybe sparks a connection through which you can both ground yourself and set yourself soaring on this planet Earth we call home. Merry everything, happy always (even when it’s sad).
https://www.merriam-webster.com/dictionary/kin#:~:text=%CB%88kin,%3A%20one's%20relatives%20%3A%20kindredkin1 of 3 noun ˈkin 1. : a group of persons of common ancestry : CLAN2 a : one's relatives : KINDRED kith noun ˈkith : familiar friends, neighbors, or relatives Kith = framily. See other posts!
